Everything in the world operates with such delicacy and synchronicity.
Everywhere your eyes choose to admire, nature finds a way to surprise you.
Every living creature, no matter how big or small, crawling from point A to point B, for whatever reason, seems to understand its role in the world.
Even if you realize the grass isn't greener on the other side, appreciate the clouds that look like mountains in the sky next to a perfectly illuminated sun.
Taking photographs to brag about a free concert ticket or stitching together images to gloat about simultaneous events and uploading them to Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter have become a part of life.
Capturing the moment has become a new priority.
Sometimes, the moment captured is for confirmation of one's social status.
As naive and shallow as that may sound, it happens.
What about money?
Money has shed a new light since the beginning of college. It's appealing, but not fully satisfying.
Instant gratification, for sure.
If someone were to ask me three years ago, would you want three thousand dollars in cash or a three thousand mile road trip?
I would've said "Cash, baby. Cash!"
Sometimes, trips are better than money.
I failed to understand the importance behind discovering national parks or visiting museums when I was younger.
I hated the annoyingly boring 2 hour car drives to Jax Beach filled with Bee Gees classics pumped through the speakers.
But yes, I am guilty of trying to synthesize moments.
10 years later, I catch myself snapping an absurd number of pictures rather than letting my eyes and mind wander to attempt to understand the intricate beauty of the world.
Now, I set my phone aside more often, while my face is glued to the side of whatever window I'm near.
And I stare.
Because I don't know when I will ever see clear, starry night skies or weird weather patterns again.
Or find the places I've never known before.
Since I'm not sure when this trip will end.
You should have seen that sunrise, with your own eyes. It brought me back to life.
You'll be with me next time I go outside.
No more 3x5s.
Just no more 3x5s
I know that in order to become a better writer, I need to step outside of beautiful comfort zones that I build and create constantly. I should read different genres, explore other writing styles or techniques, and fully grasp a concept or idea as my own to show the world. I quit journaling a few months ago because I became too occupied with school and work. For some reason, blogging seemed more appealing than journaling. I didn’t really understand how I felt that way, especially because blogging is a virtual form of journaling. Just as easily as I can cut out pictures and paste them along with my jotted thoughts in my notebook, I could do the same, but the biggest difference: everyone can see them.
ReplyDeleteThis blogging experience is the first of many barriers I have to overcome because I’m naturally self-conscious and shy about sharing my thoughts, only to have them rejected. (I’m sure this is a universal thought about sharing personal work.) Even though I cringed and frowned at the idea of blogging weekly and being graded for my thoughts, I gave my fears the middle finger and carried on. From the initial blog post, I hesitated to include several lines that demonstrated any form of vulnerability, and eventually, decided to edit most of the posts severely.
One of the challenges I had with the blog was the requirement of having a new photo in each post, but also, we needed to photograph them. We were given the option of using photos from the internet, but only to be appropriately cited. I didn’t want to give in to the second choice simply because the point of a blog is to capture moments from your personal life. This blog nudged me to explore another part of my brain and to try different activities as well. I didn’t mind being required to include a photograph personally taken.
Honestly, I’m not exactly sure what kind of direction my blog decided to embark on. Initially, I considered following a Heart of Darkness theme, but contrasting it with my title “Heart of Light”. Reading back on my blog, I think it eventually transitioned into a blog rambling about the happiness, sadness, and everything in between that I came across through these past 6 weeks. This benefitted my writing since I had the liberty to express myself in the manner that I wanted to, while simultaneously selecting bits and pieces of my writing that the audience hooked on to so that I perfect my technique. At times, I did feel as if I was scrambling to find words.
The networking created through the posts accelerated very quickly. I found myself scrolling through other people’s posts. Each post did an interesting job of searching for ways to incorporate others’ ideas so that our blogs follow our storyline, but also connecting all of the posts in some way, shape, or form. I also appreciated everyone also displaying some sort of vulnerability in some of the pieces. It helped my anxiety.
My only worry with blogs is the same as Walter Benjamin’s concern with the reproduction of art through photos or videos. Blogging is similar to taking a photograph of art: synthesizing moments to replicate the original depreciates the value of the moment or its “aura”. In a way, I made the decision to not attempt to describe any of the images, but instead paste them towards the end or in the middle of the post. That’s why my final post reiterated the idea of “You should have seen that sunrise with your own eyes”. This blog made me live a little more.